Once upon a time, there was a girl.

She was born in Kansas, where things are green and flat and windy. Like most little girls, she had a mom and a dad and bratty older brother. Unlike most little girls, she didn’t stay in one place very long. She moved to England, and South America, and Africa (all of which were more interesting than Kansas). She chased iguanas and ate British dirt. Life was good.

Eventually the little girl grew up. She went to college, fell in love with a charming Italian, and moved to Los Angeles.

Then there was a baby girl. Then…another baby girl. And another one. And another one. (Her charming Italian husband began to despair of the Italian name ever being carried on.)

Then there was a boy! (The world was shocked.)

Then there was a girl. And then, the little (big?) family seemed to be complete.

But the now-grown-up-girl was ready for some more excitement. So she moved five little girls, one little boy, and one charming Italian into a travel trailer, and they set out. It was almost as exciting as chasing iguanas through a South American rain forest, and only slightly more difficult!

The adventure ended in Texas, and the happy and worn-out bunch settled down to live in peace and harmony and relaxation all the days of their lives.

Except…they couldn’t quite manage that. So the grown-up-girl and her charming Italian husband decided they needed another little boy and another little girl, just to bring the family to an even ten. (This time, the state of Texas helped out. It was a bit more convenient that way.)

Then, just to shake things up, they decided to do speech and debate. Because traveling every other week is a breeze with eight kids.

And you know what? That iguana-chasing, trailer-buying, baby-having, foster-kid-getting, Italian-loving, tournament-going grown-up-girl…is my mom.

—

Honestly, my mom wouldn’t want me to be writing all this. (Sorry Mommy!) She’d prefer to let Mother’s Day pass without mentioning it…because she’s “not a good mom,” or something like that.

I don’t think motherhood is about perfection. It’s not about using the right homeschool curriculum, or saying the right words, or never getting tired. Ultimately, it’s about serving the ones you love through the power of the One who loves them more–and He wouldn’t give them anything less than what they need.

My mother is an incredible servant. To me, to my dad, to my siblings, to those two little foster kids who are becoming part of us forever. I know she’s not perfect–I know she gets tired and frustrated and even makes mistakes. But she is defined by much more than that.

I don’t have a “perfect” mom. But I have the perfect mom for me. And frankly, I think she’s the best.

I love you, Mommy!

Graduation is around the corner. Slideshows to create, inspiring speeches to write, invitations to send, display tables to assemble…school work to finish. Oh boy.

Who tips $6.85? Would it hurt that much to round it to $7.00? Just a thought. Not that I’m [really] complaining…

It’s been a whole lot of days since I posted on this blog. (I had something a whole lot deeper planned…but I decided to let it marinate in my mind just a little longer.) {Marinate. Yes.}

Boston is incredible, and I can’t wait to go there next month!

Speech and debate wears me out. Period. As much as I enjoy all this, there’s something in me that’s beginning to feel a bit restless.

Those adorable little foster kiddos I’ve mentioned for the past year? They’re becoming Maisanos. Or, as Hayden informs my mother, “YOUR-sanos!”

I did an [almost] 360 on a wet road two weeks ago. Thanks, God, for small towns with no traffic (either to come in contact with my car…or to see me freak out afterwards.)

Hayden came into my bedroom yesterday and said [and I quote]: “Oh, Beth! This is beautiful!” …he apparently liked my shirt. I appreciate three-year-old compliments.

It’s been too long since I’ve been able to go riding.

My bestest friend, the amazing Hopie, placed 7th in Team Policy at her Regional Championship. I’m kinda proud of her. (Actually…she got me into speech and debate.)

College is in three and a half months! I’m scared of this whole “pot-luck roommate” thing…but excited too. However that works.

Some days…I really want to write again. This summer, maybe? Yes? Hopefully?

Okay. I’m not one to ramble on here, but hey, I had to do something to fill y’all in on the past month and a half. Don’t complain.

[And don't worry...I'm stopping now.]

Dear God,

I’ve been feeling a bit down lately–you know that. Even so, I love the way you use these times to show me little things. Things I probably wouldn’t notice otherwise. [In darkness, light shines with more clarity.]

You are unbelievably good to me.

I love your seasons, but Spring is probably my favorite. You’ve given Burnet some gorgeous weather lately–the kind that makes me want to go outside and just sit. But it’s also good for taking walks with the family, and I like that too.

I love that I have opportunities for making money, these last few months before college. Sometimes it feels hectic. It is hectic…but in a good way.

I love this crazy family you’ve given me. I love that when people ask how many siblings I have, I answer “seven,” and then “five,” and then launch into an explanation. I love the possibility that soon, I’ll be able to answer “seven” without explanation.

I love wintergreen mints! [Do these things have many calories?]

I love speech and debate people. Seriously, God, they’re incredible! You must be super happy with them. I love that you cared enough to have my path cross all of theirs in the first place–after all, I wasn’t exactly too keen on that whole ‘speech and debate’ arrangement.

I love my new pens…especially the blue one.

I love my dad, who keeps his eyes open for good deals on used cars. I love my mom, who does [basically] everything.

I love the Psalms. You’re a good writer.

Ultimately, I really love you. I love that you’re there when people aren’t. You listen, watch, know, understand, care, comfort, forgive, love. Why do I even bother looking for all of that in other places?

You are incomprehensible. And in all of these, I am blessed.

Love,

Beth

You’re writing a speech.

The first step is deciding on your topic, of course. After a long process of internal debate and external agony, you settle on something particularly meaningful and sit down to write.

Then you stop yourself.

Wait! you think. I can’t start writing yet, or I’d be violating The One And Only Rule Of Platform Speeches! How can I possibly write a speech without three points?

Let’s be very clear here:

Having three points means nothing.

Where did this ubiquitous trio come from, anyway?

The talk goes like this:

“If you want to write a speech, you must have organization. One great way to organize your thoughts is to split the idea into three points, grouping your sub-points underneath. This way, you’ll have direction when you write, and your audience will understand where you’re going. Start out by telling them your three points; give the three points; and then recap the three points.”

Meh.

It’s true that having three points brings organization to the chaotic thing they call an “idea.” The problem is that sometimes, using three points to organize your speech is detrimental to the idea you’re trying to present. No two speeches are the same, and so trying to apply the three-point structure across the board is bound to result in horrors of some sort.

Take, for example, an informational speech on heroes. You decide to talk about three heroes of yours, and why their lives are meaningful. This works.

On the other hand, you might decide to take things from a different angle. You’d rather address a problem in society, pointing out that true heroism is declining due to a disregard for moral standards. How would you structure your three points?

If you think about it, this topic doesn’t fit quite so nicely into those [despicable] three points of yours. Why? Because you’re trying to get the listener to arrive at a conclusion–not necessarily informing them of one straight up. It’s a logical progression, not a statement of information.

Three points provide structure–but they miss out on a few other important factors.

What the three points lose:

1. Suspense

“Today, we’ll be looking at three points: what heroism is, how it has declined in recent years, and how our lack of moral standards is at the root of this problem.” Great! Now that I know the entire contents of your speech…can I go home?

In a ten minute speech, you have an incredible opportunity: you can put a listener to sleep, or give them something that catches their attention. Suspense is one way to capture and hold their interest–and you simply can’t do it as effectively if you lay out your three points from the very beginning.

2. Progression

Having three points lends itself well to purely informational topics–but not so well to a topic that requires a progression of ideas. In other words, the three point system might work great when classifying or dividing, but lacks much power when you need to “build up” your idea.

This goes hand in hand with the suspense factor: taking away the logical progression of your idea takes away the suspense you can create along the way. Result? Sleeping listeners.

3. Uniqueness

Okay, let’s face it. Everyone has three points.

Do you want to be like everyone else? Answer: no. Solution: don’t have three points.

Suspense. Literally.

SO I CAN NEVER USE THREE POINTS AGAIN???

No! You can use three points if you want to be a) boring, b) non-unique, or c) a spineless wimp who melts under peer pressure.

Um…I’m actually totally kidding.

If three points work best for your topic, go for it. All I would point out is that usually, three points will not be as effective as other means. Evaluate your subject carefully to make sure you’re not missing out on any opportunities to build suspense, allow for progression, or create uniqueness. (Also: for those who insist on sticking with your three points, do the world a favor and never reference these as “points” in your speech. Call them “reasons” or “ideas” or “fire-breathing dragons.” But not points. Thank you.)

What, then, shall we do? WE HAVE NOTHING IF NOT OUR THREE POINTS!

Back up, please. What is the purpose of our precious three points? Structure.

Believe it or not, structure exists outside of three points.

For those of your with speeches heavily oriented around a logical progression of ideas…believe it or not, this, in and of itself, forms a structure. Your audience isn’t inept; they’ll understand a well-reasoned flow of thoughts. Make use of that. Ditch the three points, and build your suspense instead. Chances are, your listeners won’t even notice the lack of a traditional “structure.”

The fact of the matter: a good speech will have structure, but not necessarily three points.

Now go. Kill those ridiculous triads. Be free.

Valentine’s Day. It’s that special day of the year when all your friends with “significant others” post mushy Facebook statuses and upload pictures of the flowers they got this morning, while all your single friends comment on Singles Awareness Day and eat lots of chocolate to drown out their sorrows.

Intermingled with the above, you’ll find a whole array of different statuses–ones that remind you that you are loved, single or not, and that this day shouldn’t be S.A.D., after all.

You know it’s true. You really do. But if you’re at all human, reading the words “Jesus loves you” probably doesn’t completely lay to rest that nagging sensation of loneliness. That innate desire to be loved.

This is when the time comes to step back, take a deep breath, and gain some perspective.

Human love provides temporal security.
God’s love has secured your eternity.

Human love will always be imperfect.
God’s love has never been less than perfect.

Human love is fickle.
God’s love is the foundation that makes it last.

Human love is a reflection.
God’s love is the source.

Human love is good.
And we serve a God who makes all things beautiful in their time.

Ultimately, we don’t hold the master plan. And given the choice, would you really want to alter the plans God has for your life? Could you possibly write a better romance than the one He is already writing?

The Creator of the universe has lavished me with love so indescribable, so beautiful, that everything else pales in comparison to such perfection. And even better, He’s the one who’s writing my earthly love story.

No, I don’t have a boyfriend. I am secure in the love of the One who has better timing than I do. There’s no hurry. Why?

Because Somebody already loves me.

“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” — 1 John 3:1

A year ago today, something happened that changed my life. It can’t be summed up in a picture, and even if it could, I couldn’t legally post it here. It can’t even really be summed up in words. How can you “explain” the way your heart makes room for two new hearts to love?

It was one year ago, in the parking lot at Chick-fil-a, that I met Hayden and Ruth. He was two; she was eight months. He stared at us with his big brown eyes; she smiled and laughed. He called my parents ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’; she held our hands and fell asleep in our arms.

It’s been an amazing year.

For anyone who might wonder, this journey called ‘foster care’ isn’t an easy one–but it is a wonderful one. These are two lives, two human beings. Through the investment my parents and my family have made and are continuing to make, those lives will be forever changed. Forever affected. Forever loved.

From a practical perspective, we’re not entirely certain where Hayden and Ruth’s futures will take them. Keep them and all of us in your prayers, as the next few months are full of court proceedings that will decide what happens from here. Who knows? Sooner or later, you might be able to see some pictures, after all.

In the midst of this year’s debate season, with tournaments left and right and speech-writing eating my free time, I began to think. (That’s not usually something I engage in.) After all, a good number of you bloggy readers really don’t understand the world of this thing I refer to as “speech and debate.” For all you know, it’s a nebulous place full of strange and fearful orators who promptly ensnare and devour anyone who has a pulse.

Allow me to provide some clarity.

Debaters Are:

1. Nerds. First and foremost.
2. The people who understand that “inherency” is a word regardless of what spell check says.
3. Violent highschoolers who always talk about who they’re “hitting.”
4. Flowers. (Think about that one.)
5. Easy to shop for: pens and sticky notes should do the trick.
6. Predictable. No questions will be asked until they establish that you are, in fact, doing good today.
7. A demographic that comprises approximately 83% of Google’s total user base.
8. People who bring everything back to nuclear war and imminent doom.
9. The only ones who don’t believe Latin is a dead language, and prove it by using phrases like “ad hominem.”
10. A formidable group with the constant potential to mob, usually due to the word “postings.”
11. Kids who shop for suits and enjoy it.
12. Those annoying friends who know what’s going on in the world. Almost before it happens.
13. Notorious for their intimate knowledge of just exactly how many words one can say in five minutes.
14. Brilliant geniuses who might actually do important things someday. If they have time in between tournaments.

And that’s pretty much the way we roll.

Wednesday afternoon, getting ready to leave:

Toni: “You guys can just go win the tournament, okay?”

Me: “Um…I think I’ll pass.”

Thursday morning, standing outside of the impromptu room:

Me: “I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die. I’m gonna die.”

Anna: “No. I think you’re gonna break.”

Me: “…I’m gonna die.”

Friday evening, finished with preliminary rounds:

Me: “Yay! I’m done giving the awkward original oratory!”

[Break announcements]: “Breaking to semifinals in Original Oratory…Beth Maisano…”

Saturday morning, debating in outrounds:

Me: “Jonathan. I do not want to debate in finals. I do not want to debate in finals.”

[Break announcements]: “Your team policy finalists…Maisano/Morgan…”

_____

What did I learn at this tournament? In a nutshell…God laughs when we tell him what we can’t do.

And He laughed a lot last weekend.

Tomorrow, hoards of homeschoolers with a passion for talking and arguing will make their way to a place called Houston, for a tournament called the Warmup.

So it begins.

As usual, these final 24 hours find me memorizing a speech, giving a few random impromptus, and hoping Office Depot gets all that printing done on time.  We’ll be heading out tomorrow afternoon for the first qualifier of the year. And in the end…we’ll enjoy it, whether or not that speech gets completely memorized.

At least, that’s what I tell myself.

Nationals 2010

I’ve been going through old pictures to use in my graduation slideshow this spring. So many memories in those boxes! Funny things, sad things, happy things…bad hair days…and more.

Those were the good old days.