What Not To Do At Subway

1. Comment on the number of olives on your 6-inch sub

Once upon a time, Subway decided that three olives was enough for a 6-inch sandwich.  I don’t know who came up with this number.  But it’s the sad truth.

2. Ask for random meats

“I want pepperoni, and roast beef, and turkey…okay?”  Not okay.  We have computers…and formulas.  Computers don’t like random sandwiches.  So use the menu.

3. Get your veggies out of order

“I want olives, pickles, onions, bell peppers…and tomatoes and lettuce and spinach.”  This is annoying.  Please refrain from doing so.

4. Talk quiet

There is a glass panel in front of you…and some of us aren’t tall enough to see over it.

5. Ask “Can I have my tuna toasted?”

In the words of the health department: No.

6. Be obsessively picky

“I’d like a really soft honey oat.” “Can you pick some tomatoes with no white centers?” “Three really dark oatmeal cookies.” “That bread looks too dark.” “What?!  You put salt and pepper on it?!  Can you make it over?”

7. Yell at people who make mistakes

‘Nuff said.

8. Order a billion sandwiches during lunch rush

…and watch as the line heads out the door behind you…

9. Come into the store at 9:55 PM

Please don’t do this.  I mean, really, there’s better stuff to eat at that hour anyway.  Try Sonic. Or Whataburger. Or something with an “Open 24 Hours” sign out front.

Disclaimer: This list is certainly not exhaustive.  At all.  Nor should it imply that Beth dislikes her job.  Because really, Beth is having a good summer and enjoys the extra cash.  No hard feelings, Subway…even if you do smell weird.

Tags: humor, work